When Chronic Illness makes you feel like you're living in a bubble.

Chronic illness can really make you feel like you’re living in a bubble or a glass prison.  It puts you in this state of mental isolation where it just feels like you’re watching life pass you by. You’re watching your friends’ graduate, get jobs, cars, apartments, start their careers and have children and so on. It’s excruciating because those are the simple joys of life you would believe is every person’s right to take part in but age milestones often have a price tag of health and sometimes we have insufficient funds.   It leaves you so lost because no one tells you in school what to do in life if you acquire a disability that bars you from getting a job or going to college. It can make you feel unfulfilled and like you’re wasting your life or like your life is over it’s an emotional glass prison that I will give you the keys to open the door to.

#1 Restrict your social media consumption

If you have mostly healthy friends and family members like most young chronic pain warriors do then don’t spend too much time scrolling. I know sites like facebook and twitter are very popular in the chronic illness community to compensate for a lack of face-to-face human interaction but it’s not the best way to go about it.  It has its pros and cons and one of the cons is that can serve as a constant reminder of the life and opportunities you no longer have. Seeing that too often is going to make it hard for you to focus, move forward and work with what you have.  It has its pros too of course, like being able to connect with people near and far and those we haven’t seen in years and being able strengthen an acquaintanceship into a close friendship from the comfort of our homes but too much of anything can be poisonous.

 A much better way to use the Internet to keep connected to those who you love is video chatting.  Video chatting is a lot more beneficial than just scrolling, it’s a simulation of physically being with another person and if things get too intense it’s not a big deal to cancel. You can do so many things with it as well like playing music or watching movies and it’s a great way to squeeze in social time if your friends/family are having periods in their lives where their schedule is stacked. Not to mention that you can have hang outs with friends from online support groups if your healthy friends/family lack empathy and have left you.

 Having a little virtual hangout on a weekly/regular basis can work wonders for warding off isolation. Unlike using a scrolling social media site you’re not subject to consuming the perfected version of someone’s life. Video chatting is a lot more personal you’re more likely to see that their lives are not perfect either.   It’s not always easy, I know what it’s like to be too sick to hold a conversation and have had to cancel a Skype call /end them early.  In those times using texting and scrolling sites are a good supplement, but if you’re going to use the Internet to compensate for a lack of human interaction then do the next best thing that technology has to offer for a physical meeting.

#2 outside in.

I’ve written some articles on this and you can go more in depth and get some ideas here. But to sum it up make your house as versatile as possible, you want to hang out indoors more often so that you don’t push your body into a “social/outing hangover”.  When you can emulate something that you used to go out with your friends to do indoors you won’t be as jealous or feel like you’re missing out as much.  

#3 occupying your (semi)functional time

I have written on this topic and you can go in depth here.  This is a big one though, finding a hobby to work towards and set achievable goals with will change your life if you aren’t able to go to work or school.  Find something that’s not too hard to do and something you can do even when you’re not feeling your best so that you don’t have to wait for good days/moments.

#4 Focus on you & don’t compare

Comparison is the thief of joy! Thomas Edison & Sarah Vargas said this lol.  Anyways yeah, it really is the thief of joy you’re not going to move forward in your life if you keep comparing it to other people’s lives or even your old pre-illness life. You have to live in the now and make the best out of what you have and draw in joy from any source of light in your life.  One thing that has helped me is that in my quest to bring the indoors inside ,in between making plans with my friends I try to make little plans with my family (or myself) whenever I’m able to so that I have something relaxing and enjoyable to look forward to.

Another key part of this is throwing away your old ideals! I always say our bodies function differently than abled people’s do therefore we must find different ways to do things.   & that those with chronic illness should feel incredibly strong and successful because nothing with chronic illness is simple and therefore no accomplishment is small.

I hope this helps, feelings of missing out won’t go away completely but in my personal experience taking these steps have made a huge difference in my life.

Keep fighting, keep striving, keep living, not surviving! Stay strong my painies.